Training advice for the Fit Pros

Getting where you want to be

If you are looking to change your life then chances are that you have heard about the concept of setting yourself goals. You have also probably heard that you should set lofty goals. The saying being “reach for the moon, even if you miss you will end up in the stars”. 

Goals are a great starting point when you are focusing on setting the direction you want your life to take but you have probably experienced failure multiple times as you have never managed to reach these goals. As a result of not reaching the goals you will have lost hope, changed the goal, convinced yourself that they were not the right goals that you should be setting for yourself and therefore resigned yourself from achieving this outcome with the peace of mind that “it wasn’t to be”. How many other stories have you heard from others that have experienced the same? They have set out to get a better job and advance their career, they might have suggested that they were going to join a gym and get into tip top shape, or set up an online dating profile to attract a partner to their life, only to give up after several ‘bad dates’. Many of us live a life where we allow ourselves to believe that achieving these lofty goals are for others who are far superior from us and have special ‘super-human’ abilities to achieve big goals. 

As a consequence we spend time on social media looking at how amazing other peoples lives appear and feel as though we are a failure compared because despite attempts that we might have made we have never been able to reach these big goals. We resign ourselves to the fate of catching the low hanging fruit on the tree and accepting that this is our fate, that we are simply not good enough, smart enough, or advantaged enough to achieve the goals that we really want. You might also have a circle of friends who are in a similar position to you and confirm this conclusion that you have come to, that you are simply not good enough to achieve these big lofty goals! 

Okay- let’s stop the pity party here! 

Things can be different, you just need to learn the tricks that those who achieve their goals use. Number 1- being persistent in your pursuit of the goal! Tell the truth to yourself, have you really stuck with the goal for as long as you could have or have you cheated on the goal and then beaten yourself up and failed to ever get back on track with chasing after your goal. Very successful people don’t become successful by accident! If you study successful people you will realise that they started really early and have come through an enormous number of failures before they were able to succeed! They are no different from you in failing and continuing to fail. Failure is part of the parcel to becoming successful! Through failure, you can learn what does and doesn’t work so that when you fail again you are able to fail more intelligently and then you keep going until you eventually find success. It’s going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm that will get you to the top of the mountain and rather than giving up on the outcome you want, adjusting the path that you take to achieve this outcome! The goal rarely changes, but the way in which you achieve it does.

So how does this apply to a fitness journey and seeing the results that you want in the gym? You might have had a good level of fitness and strength in the past, then slowly over time life has got in the way of this, you may have had children who have taken up much of your time. Or had become committed to your work which has taken up the time that you might have used to attend the gym previously. After a while the lack of consistency towards keeping yourself in shape has led to your physique suffering and your eating habits may have unintentionally slipped so that you are regulary not eating well enough and therefore you end up putting on a bit of extra weight each week, month. You might not even notice these small changes to begin with until, one day you think to look at yourself in the mirror and you realise that you have got out of shape again. Then you start to look back at a time when you were in shape and now you want that back again, but you find that you have demands on your time that were not there before and hence the challenge to get back into shape is a tough! Lo and behold, the struggle to get back to where you were begins! 

No ones struggle to get into shape is the same, getting in shape requires a  set of skills and staying in shape becoming consistent at using those skills. Whilst that might sound challenging it is a good thing because skills can be learnt! There are some skills that are helpful to have for both and I want to share one of the biggest skills that you can use to help you stay the course!

Accountability – It is easy enough to think that because you are a unique “special snowflake” that you need to do this sort of thing all on your own, but believe me this can be a lonely way to do it. It also means that when you do succeed, the only person who will be clapping is you! Would you not much rather have others see you succeed and celebrate with you? You can actually inspire others with your dedication to the goal and cause others to get in shape with you! 

Having them keeping you accountable because you are inspiring them. Your journey becomes more than just about you, but about others too! If you inspire others then you are more likely to stick with the dedication to staying in shape and when you come off the path you are able to get back on track quicker because you won’t just be letting yourself down, you will be telling others that it’s okay to give up when the going gets tough. I’m guessing that’s not the legacy you want to leave behind. 

So find someone who you can use to keep you accountable. Some people find that personal trainers are helpful for this because there is a check-in with that trainer every week, month and they will be able to see if you have been sticking with these goals. The pain of not reaching the goals will feel painful and so in order to avoid the pain of failure you end up following through on the process. If you follow through with the process then getting the outcome will be a forgone conclusion! 

To summarise, set goals- set big ones if you must, or small ones to start with. Use a trainer to help tailor your process and keep you realistic with a timeline to reach the goal and then find a way to stay accountable. Having the pain of not reaching milestones along the way will mean that you stay the course! Also remember that when you fail, getting back on track is important so that you continue to inspire those who are watching! 

You can do this! 

Stay Strong 

Alex O-King 

The key to winning your game is patience.

So I have a struggle that I’m dealing with at the moment and there are a lot of things that seem to be happening all at the same time which are causing me to question myself and my motivation. I often have dips in how I am feeling. I also have good highs when I am with my supporters, but generally when I am on my own I can start to beat myself up for no good reason. These feelings are uncomfortable because it means that I am often not at peace with who I am right now and this makes for a real struggle. I get upset, but can’t always explain why. I have issues with temper, but don’t always know what causes me to lash out….

I am starting to understand the trouble though and this is why I am sharing on my blog so others can come to find peace in themselves too. I currently have the challenge of dealing with a huge rest period because of my last seizure, I then managed to go back to work but only lasted two weeks until I had to stop work due to a blood clot becoming worse in my left leg. My leg had literally exploded which left me barely able to walk and last week I had to attend the John Radcliffe Hospital in order for me to get checked out! On my second visit it was decided that I required surgery to remove the clot and place a stent in my leg to help the blood to flow easier in my leg. The alternative would quite possibly mean that my leg would remain the size it had become and that I would have to live with it the way it was for the rest of my life. At present, as I am writing this, I am awaiting to hear from the hospital about when they are going to arrange for me to have the surgery.

I write about this, not for sympathy, but because this has proved a big challenge for me to overcome. Getting the surgery feels like the easy part. but the endless wait for something to happen is really what is causing most of my struggle. I really want to get back to work- earning money for the holiday that has been planned in November and also so that I am healthy when I get to my Birthday at the end of next month too! I am expecting the hospital to call me at some stage today and to organise the surgery to take place and I am really grateful that it is happening sooner rather than later! Maybe I do feel bored because it has been a long 2/3 months of waiting around, firstly to recover from my seizure and then to have my progress halted by the need to rest my leg due to the clot! All being said, something is happening and really the only way that I can tackle this is through being patient and keeping myself occupied with watching videos that teach me new things and through reading (which I love doing)

Whatever challenge you are going through right now, believe me chances are that someone has it worse than you. So persevere and believe that you will come out the other end better for the difficulties you have been through

Stay Strong

Alex O-King